Aah just a quick update on my art stuff I guess. Talking about my feels over it.
I've managed to draw almost everyday like I said I would, and I have learned a lot for myself about facial and body proportions and moment which is really cool to me. :3 But... I still don't think it's anything I could get into professionally. at least not go to college for it or anything. Idk if I'm not inspired to go for it because I don't have the money to expand to using different mediums and different hardness's of graphite and whatever else... But I just don't feel like it's for me I guess atm. I still sort of aspire to make my own manga someday... but when that happens, idk...

I think the one thing that bothers me the most about going to an art school is just the beliefs of the professionals in artist enviorments. I hated going into my Senior Portfolio class and listening to my art teacher turn her nose up to kindergarten drawings, and paintings made by the disabled and stuff like that. To me, anyone can make art whether it's an emotional scribble from a child or a memorial painted on the wall of china or something. As long as what you draw comes from your heart or a spark of inspiration, I love it all... And I would never look at a drawing someone worked so hard on and say "That is a piece of shit." I can't think that way, and I can't stand people who do that. I would rather encourage that artist to keep doing their best and better! Reach the distance! Not crush them just because they're young or they don't have hands and have to paint with their feet.

At the beginning of the year I said I didn't want to give up... well I don't. But I also don't want to sell my soul to a world of critiques and bashing, no offense to people that believe in that stuff. I'm all for critiques, but some people can just be complete assholes about it! I think I'm going to continue training on my own and then when the times comes I will make a manga, and then try to get it published without the major. it'll be like a side job. I have plenty of other things I could try to major/minor in and really enjoy taking the classes for it! Like I've wanted to go to school to make hardcore props and special affects makeup for movies! I've also thought about being a health coach! or maybe a teacher or some kind. I'm not quite sure what the future has for me, but I feel great success that I'm being able to figure myself out.

And I really feel no regrets over this choice. One time a college representative came to our senior art class and said "Only go to art school if it is the only thing you believe you can do." In other words, if you can totally dedicate your whole life to it. I don't believe that I could honestly. I love drawing, but I take so MUCH pleasure in other things too! I love to write, I love do sculpt, I love to construct, direct, dream, educate people with health, create story boards for my writing, art, and videos (That I hope to actually make soon)- I have so many tricks up my sleeve! My passions don't rely on a single thing. So I'm going to take that college representative's advice and make a new course for myself. wish me luck, guys!